Click Here To Purchase The Dysfunctional Father's Guide to Pregnancy Birth and Babies

Author: XY

Illustrated by David Shaw

ISBN: 978-0-9810037-3-3


I intentionally asked to review this book because we are about to be grandparents – again. My son, in my opinion, is far from a dysfunctional father, but I had to have a meter to be sure. The Dysfunctional Father’s Guide was the answer.


As the biological clock ticks louder, XY’s opinion is that the wife wants you, her husband, to impregnate her immediately. If she doesn’t become pregnant immediately, she will start asking her friends for infertility referrals, which will alert her friends to the possibility that “your gun doesn’t have a full clip or that you are simply shooting blanks.”   Sitting in the office of the infertility clinic seems to be uncomfortable (for men, anyway). And the doctor asks the couple how long they have been trying to get pregnant – response is “three days.” The questions that follow just go downhill from there.

There seems to be rules for announcing the news when “one of his boys made it to the beach.” First, “refrain” from using gross terms like, Hey! Did you hear that I knocked up the wife!” Secondly, you are not supposed to show any doubt as to who might be there father. “Be confident, even if you are not entirely sure yourself.” Rule three – wait a respectable time before telling  anyone that you’re pregnant – wouldn’t want to have folks wasting money for a “fetus that is no more.” Rule four, respectable is anytime before your wife starts to show – you don’t want to shortchange the family members, since they are expecting to be told shortly from the moment of conception.

From “Childbirth Classes – The Humiliation Continues” to “Junior’s First Birthday Party – “A Dysfunctional End To A Dysfunctional Year,” you will find crude humor and real insight to a man’s mind regarding family planning. 

The meter tells me I didn’t know anything about what really goes on in the minds of young men. This book is being hand delivered to my son. Now he’ll know that I know about what really goes on.


Click Here To Purchase The Dysfunctional Father's Guide to Pregnancy Birth and Babies