Reviewer John Cowans: John lives in
retirement in Chester, NS ,where he has been an Instructor with
Seniors College Association of Nova Scotia.
He is currently working on a personal memoir, Other People’s Children, and his first poetry collection, Hope.
Authors:
Cecil Murphy and Gary Roe
Publisher: Kregel Publications
Authors: Cecil Murphy and Gary Roe
Publisher: Kregel Publications
ISBN:
978-0-8254-4270-4
Victims of sexual abuse
often experience various forms of trauma for years after the abuse
has occurred. As time goes by, the question they frequently ask
themselves is ‘Why am I not yet healed?’ and ‘Will I ever be
healed?’ Sometimes, but not always, they also seek help, and
that help often comes in the form of a person, or a group of people,
and once in a while it comes unexpectedly in the form of a book like
Cecil Murphy and Gary Roe’s Not Quite Healed.
Cecil Murphy is author of
90 Minutes in Heaven( with Don Piper) and Gifted Hands: The Ben
Carson Story ( with Dr. Ben Carson) He travels extensively to speak
on topics such as writing, spiritual growth, caregiving, sexual abuse
and recovery. He has served as Pastor in Metro Atlanta, as a
volunteer hospital chaplain and as a missionary in Kenya. He
currently lives in Atlanta, GA.
Gary Roe has been a full time
minister for 30 years. He has served as a college minister, a
missionary in Japan, and a pastor in Texas and Washington. He
currently works as a chaplain in central Texas, is co-author with
Cecil Murphy of Saying Goodbye: Facing the Loss of a Loved One. He
has three adopted daughters from Columbia who are also abuse
survivors.
The keys to this helpful book are the 40 Truths which are listed at the end for easy reference and are dealt with individually, one per chapter. To give the reader some idea of what these Truths are let me give a few examples. The Truth raised in the first chapter, ‘I’m not quite healed, but I am being healed’ is followed in chapter 2 by ‘I am not quite healed; I am healing in progress’.
The opening chapters support the major premise of the
book that healing is a lifetime process, a fact that is often lost on
those close to victims, family members for example who expect
sometimes that the effects of sexual abuse can be quickly
extinguished once the abuse is over. This brings to the fore that
this book is useful to victims, of course, but just as useful to
those who are close to them are are directly involved in the healing
process. Other ‘Truths‘ have to do with spirituality, “ I
matter to God.’, Forgiveness, ‘Forgiveness is difficult for me.‘
Seeking help, ‘Admitting I need help is a sign of humility, not
weakness’, and mentoring, ‘I give to others’.
This is more
than a just a book to read and then discard. It is one that will
continue as a useful, sympathetic guide to living with the past and
making the present more meaningful so that the future can be
brighter.