Click Here To Purchase Dancing with Duality: Confessions of a Free Spirit

Author: Stella Vance

ISBN: 978-1-4663266-5-1

Publisher: CreateSpace


Today, Norm Goldman Publisher & Editor of bookpleasures.com is pleased to have as our guest Stella Vance author of Dancing with Duality: Confessions of a Free Spirit.

Good day Stella and thanks for participating in our interview

Norm:

What was your main reason for writing Dancing with Duality: Confessions of a Free Spirit?

Stella:

I read Eat, Pray, Love, and I thought, “You know, I really should write my spiritual memoirs!” My mom had always encouraged me to do this, knowing I had led a ‘fearless life of adventure.’ And she didn’t know the half of it!

Norm:

How did you come up with the title Dancing with Duality: Confessions of a Free Spirit?

Stella:

Ha, ha! Titles are always tricky. And I toyed with so many. None of them clicked with my editor. A friend had written a book of poetry entitled “Dissolving Duality.” Well, I haven’t quite dissolved it yet. And the title came to me, “Dancing with Duality.” Readers of the book said that was appropriate because I kept getting these spiritual epiphanies, yet going back to the dream of duality! Then I’d get spiritual again...You know, growth happens in cycles.

I always knew the subtitle (which usually contains the book’s theme) would have “free spirit” in it, because freedom is the main theme of the book—of my life! “Freedom,” as one of my spiritual teachers declared, could be my middle name. Yet my concept of freedom has evolved from “wild woman” to “freedom from the mind, with all its judgments, worries, beliefs, and limitations.”

Norm:


What challenges or obstacles did you encounter while writing your book? How did you overcome these challenges?

Stella:

The biggest challenge was knowing that I was exposing myself to a lot of potential judgment from people. I also wanted to protect my only living parent, my stepmother, from gossip. The way I solved this was by writing the book under a pen name, and changing most of the names of the characters. I also don’t even mention the names of two of the cities, which are small towns. Anonymity is critical for a scandalous book like mine, not just for myself, but also for others involved.

I also debated about whether to disclose everything, especially the abortions (thinking I should edit some of them), but I decided to do a complete exposé of my life in order to show the lessons learned.

Norm:

What does your family and friends think about your book?

Stella:

My sister said tears streamed down her cheek when she read about how I forgave her for having an affair with the man I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with—my very first love! She knew I had forgiven her, but it was a deeper level of understanding to read it.

My husband reported that even though he had, over the years, heard every funny and dramatic tale in the book, he nonetheless found it entertaining to read it because of the creative way in which I put it together.

Norm:

Is there a message in your book that you want your readers to grasp?

Stella:

Yes: that life is but a dream, a mere play—so don’t take things so seriously. Live life as an adventure, following your heart in fearlessness, knowing that nothing in the dream-life can possibly hurt the real you.

Forgive everyone, and most of all, yourself! Stop judging yourself and others—or you may attract the same behavior in your own life in order to feel understanding and compassion! That was the one theme that seemed to play itself over and over in my life.

Norm:

What are your hopes for your book?

Stella:

I would love to see it get into the hands of people who could be touched by the messages of hope, forgiveness, and fearlessness. I have already received some emails from young women who were touched by it, and that makes writing it all worthwhile.

Norm:

What advice would you give to someone who is considering writing their memoir?

Stella:

Just do it! When I wrote mine, I had no idea of the inner transformation that would take place. I thought I had forgiven everyone involved in the play of my life. Yet, as I wrote, deeper layers came up for me. I was able to see also the grand part that even those who had hurt me deeply played—how I grew and transformed from them. The man who betrayed me had set me free; so had the cult leader who devastated me by having my boyfriend break up with me. I began to see the big picture, and how each person who had “wronged” me had taught me something profound. I now see the grand design of my life and why each event had to occur to make me the strong woman I am.

Norm:

Are you working on any books/projects that you would like to share with us? (We would love to hear all about them!)

Stella:

Right now I am just focused on marketing. But as an experienced writer (I have won awards under my real name!) I can say, you just never know when the inspiration will hit. And when it does, I lose myself in writing. I love being in the zone, the flow of creativity!

Norm:

Where can our readers find out more about you and Dancing with Duality: Confessions of a Free Spirit?

Stella:

They should check it out on amazon.com. I am also starting a BLOG  but this has just barely begun.

Norm:

As this interview comes to an end, is there anything else you wish to add that we have not covered?

Stella:

My book has something for nearly everyone, as it covers so many categories: new age philosophy (reincarnation, psychic readings, dreams, etc), inspiration, healing, women’s issues (abortion, physical abuse my a partner, eating disorders, date rape, sexual harassment), world travels (including a year in Saudi Arabia), advaita vedanta philosophy of nonduality, and more. I think it has the potential to touch young people seeking philosophical answers. Women from the baby boom generation will also be able to relate to much of the dilemmas we found ourselves in as pioneers in the sexual revolution. I sprinkle humor in the book, because life is very funny at times. So I would classify this as a drama-comedy-philosophical adventure.

Norm:

Thanks again and good luck with all of your future endeavors

Click Here To Read Norm's Review of Dancing with Duality

Click Here To Purchase Dancing with Duality: Confessions of a Free Spirit