The following interview was conducted by: E.Dian Moore &  To read more about Dian Moore’s reviews click HERE 

To read Dian's Review Of The Book CLICK HERE

BP: When you took the first step toward recovery, can you recall your feelings that day?

Actually, it wasn’t really one day. For me, it wasn’t that clearly defined. Over about a fifteen-year period, I sought help from something like 11 therapists. I will say, though, that I had a turning point one particular summer when I hit bottom because of my sexual addiction. All that summer I barely ate, and felt as if I were dying. In fact, because of the sexual addiction, I was already emotionally and spiritually dead. But then, in those very dark moments, I finally came to understand that I had a choice: I could either live or die. But it was quite subtle, more a glimmer of a realization than a clear thought. Nevertheless, that summer is when I finally found a therapist who could really help me.

BP: What one piece of advice would you like to give to women who are being abused?

Know, in the most profound way, that there is help and hope out there. It only takes one tiny step to begin the journey. Just say the word “help” to one safe person. You are worth it. You, too, can choose life over death. You, too, can learn to see a world full of color and light.

BP: Many women feel hopeless, that there is no way out, no money, no resources, no support system. What is your advice to them?

It only seems as if there is no way out. Yes, I know how hard it is, how much courage one must have to take that first step out, away from the past. But there are women’s shelters who will help. There are safe people who will listen to you, hear your story. Just say the word “help” to one safe person. That person will help you. Why ask for help? Because when you’re in that scary place, it’s very difficult to see clearly. So just find one person who can show you the way, hold your hand on the first steps of your journey, until your feet are strong enough, your path clear enough, for you to find your own way.

Too, see if you can find a group of other women, just like you. There are many of us! And there is power in the group. When women seek help and find each other, come together, we both overcome much of the shame associated with abuse as well as discover a real sense of power. Then, we will be able to raise up our voices to our perpetrators and say “stop!”

BP: Tell us a bit about your life since writing your book—what are you doing now, how are you continuing to heal, have you had any contact with your abuser?

After writing Because I Remember Terror, Father, I Remember You, I almost immediately began writing my second memoir, Love Sick: One Woman’s Journey Through Sexual Addiction. Why? Because of the most amazing response I received from so many women around the country. After the first book was published, I began to travel around, speaking at colleges and universities, conferences and conventions. And every place I went, after my talk, women came up to me and whispered: “Thank you. You’ve told my story, too.”

After one such talk, in Athens, Georgia, I noticed a young woman clutching a copy of my book, obviously waiting to speak to me…but waiting for everyone else in the auditorium to leave first. Finally, when we were alone, she approached me and began to sob. She told me that I was the first, the only person she’d ever told that her father had sexually molested her. She said she was even too scared to tell a therapist, worried that the therapist might tell her father that she’d revealed the family secret. But she trusted me—because the same thing had happened to me.

So, in many ways, this is how I continue to heal…by hearing the voices of so many other women, by allowing their voices to join mine. There is power in the group…for all of us. So, I continue to travel. I also continue to write. Now, I have a poetry collection that will be published this January. Writing—whatever the subject matter—certainly helps me heal. I also teach writing in an MFA program at Vermont College—helping others find their voices.

My perpetrator has been dead for years—so no, no contact.

BP: If you could go back to the time when you first realized you were being abused, knowing what you know today as a survivor—what would you say to your younger self?

Here is what I would say to Little Sue: “You are a beautiful child of the universe. Know it!”