Author: Carol McKibben

Publisher: Outskirts Press

ISBN: 1-59800-941-9

Keep riding through it, this is the advice Carol McKibben offers people, women  especially, who have been in a similar position as herself.

At the age of 30, Carol’s husband sexually assaulted her despite her desperate pleas. It was time for Carol to take drastic action.

Here she tells her story about people who are vivid characters but most of all the ones who are loathsome. Throughout this book her somewhat dysfunctional family figures largely. 

Always being teased from a young age called “fatty, fatty four-by-four, couldn’t get through the kitchen door!” Carol lost much of her confidence at the age of eight when she became known as the fat kid. If only her tormenters understood why she was so fat, it was not her fault - she simply had glandular disorder. A thyroid problem that meant whatever she ate, she’d instantly pile on pounds.

For years Carol grew up not knowing what true love meant.

Dating the wrong type of boys led to trouble. Despite her parents, Carol went on to date many young men. Messed and mixed up with the teasing, Carol ended up sleeping around.

At college Carol met Adam who she later married after foolishly becoming pregnant at the age of nineteen. She thought he loved her - what else was Carol to think. For years, the constant teasing had left a deep emotional scar in her resulting in Carol making the wrong decisions. Marrying Adam couldn’t have been more deadly. Adam had been covering up a drinking problem but promised Carol he’d get help. Carol tries to get help herself but doesn’t listen to the people who warn her that Adam is a bad influence.

Meetings at Alcoholics Anonymous were a frequent thing for Adam but they soon became considerably less and less until eventually Adam made his first sexual attack on her. Shocked and distraught, Carol did not know what to do. Is this all she deserves after all she has gone through?

Will she finally be able to rid herself of the monster she married or is she simply too naive and confused to see the truth?

This is a very poignant novel, the situations are so raw and believable and dialogue is also so true to life. Parts of this biography made me feel very uncomfortable, especially the horrible episodes Carol had to endure with her toad-of-a husband who I think all readers will love to hate.

To me I felt that Carol was so mixed up with the bullying she endured as a child, she came across as a naïve little girl who slept around freely. This is only my opinion, others may think otherwise.

Altogether this is a very atmospheric book. I really got a feeling for the place where Carol lived. I could almost see her horrible husband who she married. He struck me as a man who’d lie through anything just to get his own way. At times Adam got me so angry that he could behave in that way that I just wanted shout Carol “leave him!”.

The people in this true story are vividly  portrayed with an ending that thankfully ties up all the loose ends and one where Carol manages to find her Mr Perfect. A very good book to be enjoyed by everyone.

The above review was contributed by: Jessica Roberts: Jessica has been a book reviewer for a newspaper and a national women's magazine and is working on a novel. To read more of Jessica's reviews CLICK HERE 

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