Author:Tami Brady

ISBN:  1-932690-20-4

The following review was contributed by: Sue Vogan: To read more of Sue's reviews Click Here

Ms. Brady has written a well-rounded and insightful guide to help you become the real you. She has set the book up in sections, making it easier to work through, has explained each aspect of what it takes to be who you want to be and has included exercises to help the reader through the changes they want to make.

If you could come home "refreshed," or like what you do for a living, this book may be of some help. Perhaps you want to change your "belief system" and do not know where to begin. This book is for you. But, normal is a "myth" and Ms. Brady writes that no one is "normal" -- not even our parents. She offers her perceptive thoughts as an explanation, never to leave you wondering.

The very first chapter offers a sound beginning -- deciding your needs, ambitions, and what guidance is necessary to achieve that refreshed or I-like-my-life you. Ms. Brady has included an exercise that will help you determine what you enjoy, value, take pride in and get pleasure from. It further guides you to examine the causes for your emotional pain or the reasons you may feel invalid or inferior. After working through the nine-step exercise, you will be instructed to make a timeline or business plan so that you can put the outcome into action.

This is a complete head-to-toe handbook that includes a chapter of the mental, spiritual or belief system, emotional, and physical. You are asked to be totally honest with yourself as Ms. Brady walks you through the process.

In the "how can you figure out what your particular emotional aspects mixture should be?" chapter, Ms. Brady assures the reader that all emotional aspects are not necessarily "faults." She writes, " As noted in the previous section, the prospect of exploring your emotional side may seem extremely frightening and completely overwhelming. Yet, you could easily come up with a handful of traits that you deem your emotional faults. Perhaps you think you cry too much. Maybe you see yourself as needy. Possibly you find it difficult to communicate with others. Conceivably you find it difficult to commit. Maybe you feel intimidated, unsafe, or afraid of spiders." She goes on to say, "In fact, none of these fragments are necessarily faults or automatically wrong behaviours." She breaks down the difference between being afraid of being trapped with a nest of spiders to one "scurrying across the floor of your kitchen." She suggests exploring the emotion to learn if it is "your unrealistic fear" which "may represent a learnt behaviour that you may be able to change."

In conclusion, Ms. Brady sums up that the book is intended to give "you some ideas about where and how you may tailor your mental, spiritual, and physical parts to become more relevant for your own personal needs." She states that the information contained in her book "does not represent a cure all or some sort of absolute truth. The information and methods set out in this book are merely tools."

In essence, "you are the only one who can decide how to live your life" and "you are the only one who can ultimately change your life." But, if you need a starting point and helpful exercises to find the real you, this is a must read.

Ms. Brady is a wife and mother who took her own advice. She could "stretch a dime into a dollar," clean up messes, reread stories to the children, and play with bugs in the park. But, Tami longed to be something more. She wanted her degree in archaeology. Every reason was an excuse until one day when she "had an epiphany." Everything else, as they say, is just history.

Today, Tami Brady "holds an M.A. in Archaeology and Heritage (earned with distinction from the University of Leicester, UK) and has her own archaeological consulting company." She continues to write columns and articles.